Welcome to Pro Tip #3 in my series of articles about designing unforgettable, amazingly magical, and potentially life changing retreats for writers.
I’ve learned a lot over the years about herding cats, writers, and introverts, and I feel like it’s time to share. This one’s a 2-parter.
But first!
Last week’s journaling prompts:
Next week’s journaling prompts are on the other side of the paywall with more about the incredibly powerful ways today’s writers used their Daily Pages.
#129 - Thick and Rude
#130 - Complete and Decline
#131 - Craft and Inward
#132 - Humble and Give & Take
#133 - Mystery and Masculine
#134 - Inflate and Release
TODAY #135 - Childhood and Mask
The most interesting word-pairing for me this week is embarrassing. I wasn’t wearing my glasses when I peeked at the day’s prompt on my phone and I got the second word wrong. It was supposed to be Define, but instead, I ended up talking about: #130 - Complete and Decline. [sigh]
If you want to use this journaling session to rant about something you think is in complete decline, do it. We don’t get enough space in this world to rant and be angry and just let it all out.
The beauty of a journaling situation like this is that you can do it without judgement. You can just rant to your heart’s delight about what you think is in complete decline.
Then, it’s important to go back and take a look at what you’ve written, take a step back, and ask yourself:
Okay, am I freaking out about complete decline, or am I uncomfortable with a change in status quo?
A change in status quo can be really uncomfortable for human beings. But think of it this way: When something is allowed to decline completely, it can be replaced with something so much better.
Pro Tip #3:
Set Everyone Up To Succeed: The Need
I learned one really important lesson in 2022 and I’m kicking myself for not figuring it out a lot sooner, like with the very first retreat or the second retreat at the latest. Nope. I had to learn the hard way that the string of really good, solid, successful retreats in those first years was down to my old patterns of stress success.
You know stress success. It looks like thinking on your feet, turning on a dime, and even going with the flow—if that flow is spiked with adrenaline. I’m an expert. I’m at Master status. Just for these occasions, I have all kinds of tricks and tips for getting writers to write and then keep them at it. I do specialize in inspiration, motivation, and accountability, after all.
I thought having a bunch of tricks and tips up my sleeve was all I needed—and it was, for the first dozen or so retreats.
But then I met a couple of writers who didn’t respond to me last year, and I was stumped.
It happens, and I’m happy for writers to find other coaches they mesh with better if they don’t mesh with me; I’m not everyone’s cup of tea and these two weren’t mine. Inside my writing community, To Live & Write, it’s not such a big deal. We can interact at arm’s length and I can still support their efforts and all is well, even at in-person events.
But on a retreat? With everyone stuck together in close proximity for a few days? No, thank you. It’s not good for me, it’s not good for them, and it’s not good for anyone else. In both cases last year, it spoiled the atmosphere when they were around, made things awkward, and shifted the focus in the other writers from writing towards their goals to what’s her problem?
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